Becoming The Good-Half

I am sure you are a lovable person. But have you tried initiating a chat with one who has track records of not knowing or attempting to know what it means to exude love, be loved or even validate your title as a lovable person?...

Nice to have you visit here. I meant to express that I always look forward to having you stop by my refined thought-shelf. Come on, Shall we?

I love the quip that says “two heads are better than one” or better put “two good heads are better than one”. And this saying has influenced several decisions around partnership of any sort which includes businesses, marriages etc. It originally says two being more preferred than one, never suggests having more than two isn’t a good idea.

Two is a standard for establishing quality partnerships and goes further to admonish a healthy two for anything productive. Don’t you love and wish anytime you have something going, to be partnered with someone as equally sensible and one who ideates possibilities to achieving success like yourself?

Have you also been tempted to want to have someone of high intellectual and creative capacity and zeal yet you are lacking in the complementary qualities to offer in other to boost the required productive outcome? How sad to have a strong desire for something and yet fail to meet the requisite qualities or qualification in any case to seal the partnership deal.

I once was concerned about the necessity to grow in a particular career path I had chosen. I knew I needed mentorship and good leadership to guide me accordingly. I also knew I needed to ultimately submit to the recommended leadership to stride in the right path towards my goal. You see!, this request was made prior accepting any job offer or knowing where It would deliver my role and responsibility in this new career path. But sincerely when all started playing out, it was really demanding. I almost forgot this request made it few times into my prayer request and the manifestation happened in the most unpredictable yet awesome way. Awesome, because It was a steep learning process for me in that season.

I have learned both ways to describe what good and godly means in my unique experiences. It shouldn’t be good because it did challenge me and stretch me, which was not so palatable an experience but if you like the muscles of capacity such experiences produces after the stretch, like me, then it becomes good in the end. In like manner, if challenges for you doesn’t scream pain, suffering or punishment as much as it does scream growth and tenacity, then you may be comfortable with learning new ropes regardless of the temporal impression.

So as I learned to navigate the new realities, I adjusted not because I wanted to but it fabricated an organic adjustment to change in every regard. Interpersonal skill, broader views and perspective towards challenges and how to appreciate things and people and be more expressive. It demanded I stepped out of my job description, be flexible in a healthy way to get task(s) done.

Sometimes you do not need a nice fellow to make you ascertain or gauge your level of accommodating. No, you do not need to have it all to know what you can’t do without. I am sure you are a lovable person. But have you tried initiating a chat with one who has track records of not knowing or attempting to know what it means to exude love, be loved or even validate your title as a lovable person? That one and his kind should confirm how lovable a person you are.

The honest desire to have the other half, the other good head, the other good partner in business, relationship, or job, should be less an emphasis as honestly standing by as the better half.

Back in school, I had good friends, neighbours and colleagues who made my experience interesting.  For almost a month I attended lectures in the wrong class, with the wrong colleagues, and had the wrong friends. Well they weren’t bad friends. The circumstances just changed what would have been benefiting, to making them not right for me. My assessments eventhough I passed turned out to be failures because I wasn’t supposed to be there in the first place. My elder brother assisted me through my entry registrations which took a whole lot of weight off me. But just the simple task of having to search for my legit classroom or lecture hall as it were, was an uphill task for me.

For your curiosity, I didn’t quit my honest friendships. However, I located my original lecture hall and continued. I got a lot from this lesson, as you know life written on papers are not always as few in real experiences as the script. This taught me a lot of natural lessons. People out of their honest experiences formulate expressions in idioms or local parlances that dates back to their experiences. A few would be what I believed to be; ‘trust your hustle’, ‘half bread is better than none’ etc. Maybe you do not have any, or any you have lived to believe is not named here, the point remains that our experiences should never be granted permission to inflict wounds that affect our ideologies or mindsets.

I recounted that experience to say that I ultimately asked to be built by God, and equally appreciate how He orchestrates edifices of well developed, spiritually intelligent and compassionate people from terrible experiences. Indeed, He is a master builder, a competent designer and a righteous judge to know adequate materials of life experiences that may not make the headline as fantastic experiences but by divine incidences instill healthy capsules into our soul. The reason you no longer trust your hustle nor rely on half bread for fear of no bread at all.

These experiences change your perspective, to position you as a healthy one long before the other half. Ever asked what it means to have a square peg that fits a square hole? This sense of compatibility demonstrates the fulfillment that comes with not just a good compatibility but a godly one.

As you are aware, my contents are intentional to deploy grace and ultimately give glory to God. The scripture in Romans eight verse one reveals that “Therefore there is now no condemnation (no guilty verdict, no punishment) for those who are in Christ Jesus (who believe in Him as personal Lord and Saviour).

In reality we have to become square pegs, to judge the bespoke fitting of the square holes. This is a metaphor to enlighten us to desire more to become a fit piece. The bible is scattered with metaphors to open us into the realities of life and godly living. I remember posting a piece during an edition of my feature #Nightcap titled “Become first an iron”. The inspiration came from Proverbs twenty-seven verse seventeen, “Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend.” you see why you must stride to become the iron that is willing and able to sharpen, because you may not always be fortunate to have people around with the ability and natural willingness to do so.

We can begin to picture a society full of this understanding and willingness to work and grow towards becoming the iron in the scripture or becoming the better half waiting to be paired in God’s timing, or the good head to engage divine wit and strategy to make businesses or relationships work.

Before we call it quite a read, I love the way my elder sis narrates experiences, movies, acts or any scenario. If she narrated a script that probably had two parts or scenes, you just would be glad to save your money for the next. She is that good and I want to borrow her skills to end this piece with a story we can deeply learn from.

A beautiful young lady was pressured to look for a partner to settle with, and to her amazement it felt like such a daunting task. She was from a Christian home with respectable values that regulated her lifestyle. She knew what she shouldn’t do to undermine her family values but was challenged everytime she stepped out to explore her options. The movie; when she got so worked up over the task, she consulted her parents that prescribed the right medication for her predicament. Need I ask if you have ever found yourself in that terrain like the girl; may not be in the area of choosing the right partner, but in business and other cases as earlier mentioned. If you haven’t grasped any wisdom yet, this may be for you. The father like any responsible father acknowledged his responsibility to help prepare and protect the lady from further heart breaks and regrets until the day of pairing or authenticating compatibility.

Now not to mislead you, this duty changes from time to time. In some homes, this duty may be entrusted to the mother or both as a team to help. She was offered pills of soy bean that had exactly the answers she needed and had the provision for her hopes and dreams for the future. And when she asked sincerely how some piece of soybean was going to be a lasting solution. The father responded that she was misappropriating the equation by wanting a harvest before planting the seed. He expounded that the delay was divinely orchestrated for her to grow in the knowledge of God’s desire for what she desires. To do it God’s way, you need His thoughts and guidance. You don’t want to trust your hustle again that would not yield anything, atleast not a godly harvest.

Do you want to find someone who loves crazily?, Become that one. You want to find someone who gives unconditionally?, Become that one. You want one who has the right strategies for everything?, Grow and learn skills that would position you as a timely strategist. When you eventually become, then the pool of divine gravitation attracts you to a befitting other half. You suddenly have fused ideologies, thoughts, and alignment on a decision(s).

In conclusion, becoming a good half is not so much about finding the perfect or befitting half as it ultimately is Becoming the better half, better other, the good head etc., as God has designed it to be.

I pray your understanding and zeal grows towards becoming the other half waiting to be paired in other to produce seamless bountiful pairing options.

#Becomingthegoodhalf #Faith #InyeneUdoekong